REFLECTIONS: Being and Being Present

The worst part of good dreams is waking up, and the best part of bad dreams is also waking up. I dreamed I had forgotten a dear friend's birthday, and in that dream, I was overcome with the terrible anguish of having been absent during an important moment in her life. Fortunately, when I awoke, I discovered her birthday had not yet arrived—there was still time to congratulate her, to call her, to visit her...

The paradox is that when the day finally came, I nearly forgot again. I became tangled in daily haste, urgent tasks, work obligations... and in the end, all I managed was a phone call. And the guilt gnawed at me.

I have thought (and overthought) how, in these hectic and complex times, one risks becoming absent from the lives of those who truly matter. We convince ourselves there will be time later, that friendship is sturdy enough to endure, that a delayed call is no great offense.

It starts with missing small gatherings, postponing those calls, trusting that if the other person needs something, they will reach out... Without realizing it, relationships begin to cool, to dissolve in the whirlwind of days.

There lies the fear of not being present when needed, the fear of becoming just a name in a contact list or a perfunctory greeting on social media. It is not a lack of affection, but a lack of time... or of failing to prioritize.

I have caught myself (and, once again, felt that anguish) remembering too late that someone important to me was celebrating something special or going through a difficult time. Saying "I love you" or "I'm thinking of you" is not always enough. One must be there.

We must carve out time, dedicate real moments to family, to friends, to the people who matter. Friendship does not always persist like wild grass in an open field. A garden must be tended.

I would love to say I have learned this lesson well, but I remain the one who forgets birthdays, who promises to call tomorrow and lets tomorrow stretch indefinitely. And though my friends know this, and though some understand better than others, I cannot stop reproaching myself.

What matters is that they know they are in my thoughts, but it also matters that I make the conscious effort to prove it. Being present is not a symbolic act—it is a real commitment. And the life that so often overwhelms us cannot be an excuse. I do not want to keep dreaming of my absence. I want to be there.

Translated by Sergio A. Paneque Díaz / CubaSí Translation Staff